Community.

“Mama, I am curious, what is community?”

Firstly, I have actual no idea how and when my kid got to be so eloquent. It’s almost certainly nothing to do with growing up in my house. Can’t be. I’m a foreigner whose English was largely learnt on the mean streets of Plaistow. Those who have heard me speak would agree that I would be more likely to ask the same question as “oi, bruv what be community thou?”.

Her question throws me for two reasons. Firstly, because I am struggling to compute how articulate this kid is and the sorts of things in her surroundings that intrigue her. I think it’s because I have always (will always?) considered myself to be a working-class immigrant and am honestly struck by how different her life is to mine. I swear at her age I was mostly curious (or maybe baffled is a better word) as to why grown-ass men were drinking outside in -20c when they have a house. Is it really possible such an overhaul of existence has been achieved in a single generation?

I stand there looking at her as I’m trying to put together the algebra equation of my life and what it is exactly that makes me identify as working-class. I don’t exactly hold a job that would be classified as ‘working’. But I am very much a hustler- does that count? I live in a nice London postcode with many trees and lots of shops selling things like vitamins by weight. I own a number of Sweaty Betty leggings, a BMW and a King Charles Cavalier. I don’t know a single Charlene, Gary or Vicky, but know more than one Otis. Jesus Christ on a fucking stick- I’m a fraud! I don’t think the committee will take into account that I don’t own a gilet when they drag me out of the club, revoking my ‘Many Not Few’ membership.  

Back in the room, I realise I’m just staring into space yet to respond to the child.
Very good question- what the fuck is a community, and how does one best explain the concept thereof to a 5-year-old?

“Erm, well, it’s like when you live near people, and you help each other out and/or like hang out with some people cos you’re into the same thing. But not like a friendship group, cos those are just your friends”. She looks at me like I’m making it up as I go along. I kind of am. I don’t know where to start with this one. If an adult asked me the same question, I would say, a community is a group of people living in the same area and have similar values or interests. It’s easier to define to an adult as most ‘big ones’ have been tainted by experience and are aware of the unspoken rules of social interactions, and the many connotations of words and concepts.

For an innocent brain, who just takes things at face value, explaining all the various things a community can mean is pretty hard. It can be a neighbour(hood) thing. But what if you don’t know your neighbours or if they’re wankers- you wouldn’t accept them as part of your community. Or do you have to by default?! What parameters are in place to define a neighbourhood’s community lines? Is it a few streets or the whole thing as defined by a council? What about adjacent neighbourhoods? Are they part of the community, or do those living there have to be of the same class/income to be allowed in? What about communities formed by interest, religion, organisation and culture. What do we even do as a community? What of online communities- are those like forums, or could it be anyone with an Instagram account? Or maybe it’s followers of specific accounts?!

Fuck, right, so erm, basically kiddo, I think a community is a group of people, of any size, anywhere. This group of people doesn’t necessarily have to like or even know each other but share one or many interests and are generally nice to each other. Unless they are an anonymous troll, the kind that doesn’t have pink hair.

“Mama, what are interests?”

Remind me to buy her a dictionary.